You know, I really didn’t expect to be so damn overwhelmed this semester this fast.  I’m in the second week and I already feel like I can’t stay caught up.  But then again, I really screwed myself over this semester when it came to classes so I guess I’m getting what I deserve.  I’ll just be happy when I can stop taking the classes that really “won’t matter” when it comes to my degree.  Yes, I know calculus is important and it saves the world or whatever my teacher told me but honestly… c’mon!  Gimme my bio classes and I’m happy.  I’m looking forward to Virology.  :)  Not looking forward to more chemistry related classes (because I looooathe chemistry).  But I already have my minor in chemistry and I didn’t even know it and now I’m on the verge of a double major.  Do I really need a chemistry major on top of my biomedical one?  Ugh.  UGH!  School is so very, very evil.  Evil!

Guess how much my damn backpack weighs this semester.  Just take a guess.  If you guessed about 47, you’re right.  Yeah - I fucking threw that shit on a scale and it’s almost 50 pounds of pages and calculators and pencils and junk just piled on my back.  That is ridiculous. And it’s about to get 2.19 lbs heavier.  But that’s ok because I really needed that tiny beauty for note taking.  Nothing fancy, just a little notebook for hauling around because there is no way in hell I am taking my Powerbook with me to school.

School is taking me so long.  So very long, it’s horribly painful.  I find myself regretting the fact that I was never motivated enough in high school to apply for colleges or even think about what I wanted to do with my life.  However, if I would have started right away, I have a feeling I would have wasted a large amount of time taking classes I would never use/need.  If you would have asked me in high school if I wanted to be a doctor, I would have laughed so incredibly hard in your face.  I didn’t have that revelation until a couple of years later.  So maybe this is my chosen path and maybe I was supposed to slack off for a while, right?  And if I can save one person (emotionally or physically) then all of this drawn out shit and stress will be worth it, right?  Right.

I hate labs.  I really do.  And right now I really hate my anatomy lab.  I already have to dissect a damn cat next week and let’s just say I’m not too excited about it.  You think I would be used to labs now after taking general bio courses and chemistry and fuckin’ organic chemistry (DIEDIEDIE) but no, I still dislike them.  :/

I’ve never been in a large lecture class, either.  My anatomy class has like 100 students in it and it sort of freaks me out.  It also worries me that the teacher really doesn’t care because how in the hell can you keep up with 100 students?

This is the first time in my college career that I’ve seen students with multiple backpacks.  And I really do understand why they’re necessary now.  The other day I saw a poor girl with three large backpacks:  one on her back, a messenger bag on her shoulder, and one of those roller backpacks dragging behind her.  Good Lord, why must books keep getting fatter?

The address book in my phone has grown substantially with other students’ numbers.  I’ve created groups in my phone - calc partners, anatomy lab kids, and chemistry sucks but these people all know it.  It’s great knowing that if I have a question I can send a mass email/text to everyone and get the answer in about 2 seconds.  But all of us college freaks know that having the answer really doesn’t help you in the end.  If you don’t understand how to figure it out on your own, you’re pretty much screwed.  But nonetheless, texting groups are very helpful.

School; it really is the story of my life.

That’s where I’m at right now and I really will try to update more.  But forget about me - how is everyone else doing? Anyone else in school at the moment?  Are you drowning as much as I am?  For people not in school - how’s your work/kids/spouse/life in general?  I’m curious to see how everyone is doing because I rarely get online anymore to check up on you folks.  So fill me in!

Ok, I shouldn’t even be online right now.  I have three chapters of calc to do plus I need to be studying for an anatomy quiz I have in about 3 hours.

I haven’t really been part of the “net scene” for years.  Ever since my camgirl days, I’ve kind of faded out of the web… or so I thought.  Over the past couple of years I’ve gotten some pretty interesting emails from people asking what I’ve been up to.  And every now and then someone will send me a link to a site or forum where people continue to talk about me (i.e. make up rumors about what I’m doing these days).

Got a pretty interesting one lately.  Apparently some people on some lame ass website are saying I’m some sort of escort who travels the world and meets high-end clients for money.  Another person said I do sexual favors in some club for $100 and that they have photographic evidence of it.

Hehe!

Sorry to disappoint everyone but I’m definitely not an escort.  Nor do I travel the world (although that would be pretty nifty).  I’ve also never performed any sexual favors for money.  And to the person who claims to have photographic evidence of me doing naughty things - please, please, please send me copies of that shit!  I’d love to check it out.

I’m still your average college student and there’s nothing really more to it than that, sorry.  I start back to school on August 25th and I’m taking Stats, Calc, Human Anatomy, and Cell Bio.  I just don’t have time to get down and dirty and travel to exotic countries and give dudes blowjobs.  Sorry.

I’m sure I’ll hear some more interesting rumors about me soon enough.  And I’ll definitely share them because they just keep getting better and better. 

And speaking of school… orientation is tomorrow!  Joel has decided to take the day off from work and go with me so I’m excited he will be taggin’ along.  More posts coming soon, I swear…

I knew July was going to be trouble.

First and foremost, our court date was yesterday.  We ended up settling the case so I never actually stood before the judge (which is good because I was too damn stressed over everything and I am not sure how well I would have handled it).  Our ex-landlords ended up giving us $500 more which is great.  We didn’t get everything we asked for but oh well, it was fine with me.  They realized they couldn’t argue us with our pictures but there was also a chance that if we continued with the case, they would attempt to countersue us.  I really didn’t want to go through that hell so oh well.  It’s over with, it’s done, the end.

Wednesday afternoon I was at work and got some pretty shitty news.  My job, along with like 20 others, was terminated.  I was in that position for four years.  We got a new CEO not too long ago and he went on a job cutting spree and got rid of most of the people in the same job field as me as well as some directors.  Since I’m not being fired, I have four months to find another job.  During these four months I am still getting paid, still get my full benefits, etc.  So it’s like a four month paid vacation.  Now, while some people would be thrilled to have a four month paid vacation, I’m not.  Not in the least.  I just got accepted into UNC and now I have to find another job that will work around my school schedule.  That is going to be the hardest thing to negotiate with any new job I find.  I’m also not going to find another job making what I’m making now.  No way in hell.  I had it made in this position and now it’s gone.  :(

I applied for another job at the same company today so we’ll see how that goes.  It’s not as awesome as my last position but it’s something.  That way I can keep my same benefits and everything.  AND keep my tution reimbursement.

On top of all this, it seems like every single bill I have is due right now.  Just way too stressed.

Fuck July.  Fuck it.

Start date:  August 25th

Oh, life.

I’ve been busier than hell lately trying to get registered for the fall semester of college.  This is what I get for waiting last minute.  I don’t even know if the classes I need are going to be available or not.  With my luck, everything will already be full.

I got my award letter yesterday informing me the amount in loans I’ve been awarded.  When you take The Colorado College Opportunity Fund into consideration, I really won’t be paying as much as I thought.  However, I’ve never taken out loans for school before (I’ve always paid for it out of pocket) so I didn’t really know how much of the loans to accept.  So… I accepted all of it.  *smirks*  Is that wrong?  I’ve really been getting better at managing my money.  No, seriously, I really have.  So I decided if everything goes right and I get accepted in all the classes I need to be in, those left over loans will go into my savings.  My savings has become my little treasure.  I rarely touch it and I think those funds would remain relatively safe in there.  I’ll use what I have to and then pay off the rest of the loans A.S.A.P.  I also get tuition reimbursement from my work.  The only thing I am really worried about are the cost of books.  Ooh, don’t get me started on goddamn books, seriously.  You wanna talk about a rip-off!  Those things cost what… $5 to make and put together and yet we pay $300 for one biology book, $200 for a Calc II book!  Ri.dic.u.lous.

Last night I spent about 4 hours or so browsing the student website for my college.  I logged into the registration area, set up my email, etc. etc.  When you log in, the welcome screen has Dictionary.com’s Word of the Day listed.  Yesterday’s word was indigent which means extremely poor.  HA!  What made it even more humorous is the fact that it was listed right above the links to my financial aid loans.  Yep, totally taking that as a sign.  A sign that I will be in debt to colleges from this day forward probably for the rest of my life.  It’ll be worth it though… right?  RIGHT?!  Someone please comfort me and remind me that a higher education in this day of age is worth something!

Even though I just said I really am doing better at managing my money, I can’t stop with the MAC!  My list is growing and I love every piece of makeup that company has to offer.  But I’m done buying it for a while.  I really am.  It’s such an expensive addiction but damn-it-all-to-hell, I’m getting mighty good at eyeshadow application and I can pull off some really neat looks now!  I never thought I would be so in love with such bright colors (I still think my favorite MAC eyeshadow is Parrot - I use it all the time).  But sorry, MAC - I’ve got to start worrying about school again so I have to put you on hold for a bit.  That doesn’t mean I can’t work on some wicked makeup tricks, though.  I need to take swatch pictures of all the colors I have and upload them.  It’ll take a while but it’s something I really want to do.  They’re just too damn pretty!

In other news, I meet with my lawyer tonight regarding my small claims case.  At $100 an hour, you better believe I’m gonna be talking fast and rushing her because this whole thing is getting obsurd (well past that point, actually).  My ex-landlords hired an attorney and he’ll be representing them in court, as far as I know.  They’re running out of time to file a Notice of Representation so they better hurry their asses up!  It has to be done at least 7 days before the dreaded court date (July 10th).  But yeah, I’m seeking legal advice just to get some information and make sure I am doing everything correctly, more or less.  The woman I’m meeting with is going to call their lawyer as well and let him know that I’ve come to her and that she will be representing me if this is the path they choose to take.  I am hoping that once the landlords see I am not joking around and am willing to hire a lawyer just like them, they’ll decide to settle and stop being greedy scumbags.  I have a feeling they hired this attorney just to call and scare me into settling for less and there is no way that is going to happen.  Joel and I have put too much of our own money and time into this crap so far and I’m going through with it, period.  So everyone please cross your fingers for me and I’ll let you all know what the lawyer says tonight after I talk to her.

So far 2008 has really sucked some major ass for me.  Old, crusty, sour ass for that matter.  I’ve been nothing but stressed and tired 24/7 and my hatred for the human race grows more and more every single day.  July will probably be my worst month; there’s just too much to get done and put up with.

Right now I can honestly say “fuck my life” and mean it.  Hopefully that will change soon.